Monday, June 13, 2011

The Only Time Divorce Doesn't Hurt Children is When They're Dead

This title couldn't be more true. I can't take credit for it though--all the credit goes to this article in The Huffington Post.

But I do agree whole-heartedly with the statement. I believe I will forever be saddened by my parents' divorce (although not crippled) until the day I die. It's sad to see two people you love and who used to be in love suddenly turn on one another. And depending on your situation, things can get pretty ugly really fast. I also reasonated with the part of the article that says the divorce will continue to rear its ugly head at every single family get-together. I know my husband & I have plenty more difficult times ahead of us. Children's birthday parties, graduations, etc. My family will undoubtedly be thrown together at some point or another and I'm just not sure things will go smoothly. I wish I could say I think they will. But I've learned to have as few expectations as possible.

And then there's the thought of actually seeing my parents together in the same room again. I know the first time I experience that will be difficult. It'll be a face-to-face reminder of what is no longer there. I've seen my parents together for nearly 25 years...how can I fathom seeing them together again in a different capacity?

Has anyone else dealt with that? If so, what advice would you share with the rest of us ACOD's? Does the awkwardness ever go away? How did you deal with seeing your parents together again after the divorce? Would love to hear everyone's thoughts. As always, if you don't feel like commenting here, feel free to email me at acod16@gmail. I welcome all perspectives!

5 comments:

Mademoiselle Michael said...

Insightful post. We look for restoration- sometimes we find it through an amicable divorce/separation, sometimes it takes a few years, sometimes we don't see it this side of Heaven. My situation was much different and you know the outcome. I think for your situation, much of your closure will probably just come from YOU, and not from your parents. I love you. You're such a wise and remarkable woman. xoxoxoxo!!

Melissa said...

wise and remarkable woman is the best way to describe you, shelly...thanks for this post, as always <3

Pepperberry's Flowers said...

Melissa you should give yourself some credit too! You're a brave girl who is accomplishing great things in Law School...holler! How awesome is it that you're devoting your life to others? #ahem #remarkableaswell

Mademoiselle Michael said...

oops...that was me...under a different name. wicked smart.

MVroom said...

Thanks for your encouragement, Colls!!

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