Changing My Focus

Let's face it...the holidays can really suck, can't they?

As Thanksgiving approaches, I've been really focused on my attitude and perspective on life. This is the second Thanksgiving that my parents have been officially divorced and it's still difficult. I feel like no matter what I do, someone is left out. So I've started to dread the holidays. I sit around and focus on the things I don't have, namely my parents not being together. I don't focus on the fact that I have a wonderful husband, a new home or a job I love. All I think about is what I've lost.

It's hard not to focus on that though. After all, the holidays are about getting together with family. So when your family isn't what it used to be, it seems all-consuming. But here's the thing...my parents' divorce isn't all that's happened in my life over the past two years. I've experienced joy, accomplishments, happiness. So why is it so hard to focus on those feelings?

This year I'm making a promise to myself. I'm going to make a list reminding myself of the good things that have happened in the past year. Forget the fighting, the anger, the hurt, the tears. It doesn't mean they don't exist. It just means I'm choosing to remember the good. The things that make life worth living. Because if I don't focus on those things, then what good is celebrating the holidays? What good is living life? I owe it to my husband, my family and my friends to be happy during this holiday season. But above all, I owe it to myself.

I hope you all can find the strength to be happy this Thanksgiving. To allow yourself to laugh. To overindulge (that's the best part, right?). To focus on the moment and enjoy every second. Because we deserve to. Because, despite everything that's happened, life must go on. And we need to allow ourselves to live it.

Feel free to email me at acod16@gmail.com if you need to talk, vent or just need encouragement. Wishing you all a wonderful, healthy Thanksgiving!