Friday, February 11, 2011

Why So Angry?



Anger.

A word I've grown quite familiar with lately. I'm not saying I was always Mary Sunshine, but lately I just feel angry all the time. I usually tell myself to stop being angry, but you know what? Sometimes anger is good. Healthy, even. Hey, if Oprah says so, then it must be true!

Most of my anger is related to my parents' divorce. But you know what I've realized? It's not specifically the divorce I'm angry about. It's that they got to this point to begin with. I feel like they've let this family down.

I've been finding that my anger over the divorce seeps into other areas of my life (which naturally my husband isn't so thrilled about). If one thing goes wrong, I get angry and feel like I've lost control. Has anyone else felt this way? I think it's normal. But it's going to be a struggle to deal with it.

In the meantime, I'm going to let myself feel anger. But I'm also going to let myself feel happy and excited. And sad. And frustrated. And every single other emotion that may come to mind. I've learned that in situations like this, it's nearly impossible to censor your emotions. You shouldn't even try. Because if I never feel anger, then I'll never appreciate the joy of feeling happy or content.



4 comments:

Anonymous said...

yes, yes, yes!!! Especially about the seepage (hate that word btw) haha but it fits. I totally agree that it's important to let yourself feel it. I also think thought that it's been good/important for me to realize that while God is 100% ready/willing/able to take/listen ALL of it all the time(and He knows already that I'm at least also mad at Him) that others aren't necessarily. Usually they aren't the ones who "deserve" it in the first place, and even if they have "earned" it...if I'm honest I know I don't want to be a destroyer too. So there's incentive to also try hard to show grace despite my anger...at least outwardly.

Lyndsey said...

I am in the same situation as you. I found your blog on an ACOD message board. I am going through the SAME exact thing as you are. Planning our wedding was tough as neither of my parents seemed happy. My mom called me 2 days after our honeymoon to let me know she was leaving my dad for some other man. I was devastated, still am but I'm getting better. I liked your post a lot especially the part about censoring your emotions.Its really hard sometimes especially being a newlywed and the expectation is to be happy. Its hard to not let your anger seep into other parts of your life. I would love to chat with you about your going through. Its great to have someone who knows what your going through. Its hard to understand if your not. I am a Christian and believe that God has a purpose for everything, its hard to see that in this situation. I know that he has plan. It truly is hard to show grace despite anger.
-Lyndsey

MVroom said...

Thank you so much for your comments! Lyndsey--would love to chat with you. You can email me at mzeigler2008@gmail.com. Thanks and please pass this blog along to anyone else who may benefit from it :)

Elizabeth Gin said...

Hey Michelle - I'm sorry to hear your parents are getting a divorce. It is really shocking and hard to imagine. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings though. You, Melissa and Mike will be in my prayers.

Love, Elizabeth

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...