Thursday, March 3, 2011
Unfortunately I'm not talking about this kind of picking sides...
I've read alot of stories from other ACOD's (that stands for adult children of divorce) and I'll be honest...I'm not sure which is worse: having one parent do the leaving or having both decide to leave. In my case, both of my parents decided on the divorce.
It's been hard because there's not one parent I can confide in. Both have distanced themselves from our family as they deal with their issues. It's not like I can call one of them up and share with them how hurt I am. And that really hurts.
However, I do see how it could be difficult if one parent just up and left. Then you'd almost be forced to pick sides. You'd most likely identify with the one that stuck around and hate the one that didn't. It's almost worse to pick a side because then you get sucked into the emotions of the parent that you sided with. Tell me if I'm wrong, here. I'm curious to know if those who have sided with one parent feel just as lonely as me, whose parents both decided to end the marriage.
Or perhaps both situations are equally awful. Maybe ACOD's are thrust into the middle no matter what the situation. Maybe we are always going to be asked to pick sides. But at least that's one thing we have control over: we don't have to.
Would love to hear from those of you who experienced one parent leaving or cheating...did you feel like it was more difficult to side with just one parent? Are there any like myself who experienced both parents giving up on the marriage? If so, do you feel more lonely as a result? As always, feel free to post anyonymously.